John Adams, the miniseries

We’ve recently finished watching the entire 501 minutes of John Adams, the miniseries originally featured through HBO, now available on a three part dvd set.  Although it took us a few months to squeeze in those minutes, it was worth it.  

The series, which spans America’s first 50 years, was directed by Tom Hooper with the screenplay  based on the book, John Adams, by David McCullough.   Paul Giamatti and Laura Linney were outstanding in their portrayal of John Adams and Abigail Adams and the love story between the two was an unexpected delight. 

I don’t know my history well enough to say if the series was 100% accurate with regard to historical events, but then I love a movie that spurs my interest in historical figures I previously thought dull.  I’ve done some light reading on the John Adams family since watching the epic and marveled at the story of his daughter, affectionately known as Nabby.  

Aside from being reminded of the wonders of our advancements in the medical field, particularly anesthesia, my appreciation increased for our founding fathers as a whole.  Their intellect and vision for this nation is something that seems altogether lost in our modern age.  I couldn’t help but wonder what Thomas Jefferson and John Adams would think about our current state of affairs.  

My only criticism of the miniseries is that on the 2nd dvd, which includes the time period when Adams was away in Europe as Minister Plenipotentiary,  the story is continually far removed from the action of the Revolution.  It probably seems absurd to say that a series over 500 minutes long could be fleshed out, but I would’ve enjoyed fewer scenes of Adams and Franklin in Europe and more of General Washington on the battlefront.  David Morse was excellent as George Washington and I enjoyed the nuances that his part brought to the credibility of the story.  

The ending was marvelous, a perfect way to conclude the story of his life and legacy.  It’s a blessing that so many of Adams’ words were recorded for posterity, especially those written to Abigail, his beloved friend, counselor and wife of over 50 years.  

Lord's Prayer in Old English

I found this striking video as posted by a friend in a Christian discussion forum.  It is supposedly in the standardized West Saxon literary dialect of Old English also known as Anglo-Saxon.   The accompanying landscape videography is most appropriate, being filmed at Arthur's Seat in Edinburgh, Scotland.

Watching this brings to mind the questions of the relationship between prayer and landscape. If, during our corporate prayers, we worship within the Body of Christ, surely in private times of communing with God in a garden, a solitary trail in the woods or by the sea, we are enfolded by the hands of creation.   

Resting in the Shadow of the Cross

These past few weeks have been busy ones and I have found little time to indulge my thoughts here. Interesting though, how my desire to write is intensified by the time spent apart from it. For me, writing is therapeutic and often helps to sort out issues and focus on the essentials in the Christian life.  Nothing could be truer of this week in particular.

Our son is away for his first experience of church camp and I have had restless moments, wondering if he is having a good time, resting well, making new friends, etc...the list goes on.  My son has often said that I'm overprotective and I can see that he's right... it has been hard to let go this week and completely trust his well being to others.  It's a test of my faith.  How much do I really trust God?

Last night I was struggling, unable to sleep and plagued with anxious thoughts.  I went to my prayer corner, before our icons of Jesus Christ and the Theotokos, lit the candle and wept.  I recalled the words of Fr. Seraphim, from Holy Cross Monastery, who reminds me that it is humility that defeats the snares of satan.  Our enemy knows our weaknesses and will attack us at every turn through those vulnerabilities.  

And so, my prayer was the Jesus Prayer,   "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner"  with prostrations, for satan & his minions cannot bear the true worship of God.  As I signed the cross and sat on the floor watching the flickering flame, peace came.   

"You know, you hold Truth in your hand when you sign the cross" Fr. Seraphim has told me.  By placing your three fingers together you proclaim the Holy Trinity and the last two fingers resting against your palm signify that Christ is both fully God and fully man.  Sometimes this signing of the cross is my prayer ...when I cannot think of words to say, I can rest in the shadow of the glory of the cross.  

As Fr. Peter Gillquist writes in his book, Becoming Orthodox, "...the cross is more than a symbol for earthly decor;  it is a weapon of peace that sets us free from being slaves to sin, death and the devil."   

A mighty weapon indeed. 

Snapshot ~ Thursday Morning

I am reading:  Father Seraphim Rose, His Life & Works by Hieromonk Damascene

I am listening to:  The Northern Athos Choir of Valaam Monastery

I am seeing:  rain and gray skies and my faithful companions at my feet (Shiloh & Mr. O'Malley)

I am thankful for:  the State Trooper that gave me a warning rather than a speeding ticket ;-)

I am smelling:  L'Occitane Honey incense

I am praying for: Our dog and God's grace to be plentiful in my heart

I have discovered:  that my children always want to wear what's in the dirty clothes basket

I am thinking:  about my road trip this weekend!

One of my favorite things:  hearing my daughter read and make up songs and watching my son tend his tomato plants

Miraculous Healing in Our Parish

It was only in April of this year that a dear lady from our parish was diagnosed with brain cancer and given only a few months to live.  Such devastating news for not only the immediate family, but the entire church body who esteem her highly.  

I first learned about Mrs. H on our trip to Holy Cross Monastery, near the end of April when a moleben (muh LEH ben) was served to ask for the intercessory prayers of St. Panteleimon (the patron saint of Holy Cross)   for Mrs. H as well as other ill family members of our group.  

St. Panteleimon lived in the 4th century A.D. and was martyred under Emperor Maximian.  His name means all-merciful and is frequently invoked by those seeking his prayers to God for their health and healing.  St. Panteleimon had been trained and educated as a physician and spent his life with the suffering, the weak and those in prisons, praying for them and healing them in the name of Jesus Christ.  His gifts of healing became so well known in the Roman Empire that other physicians became jealous thus creating the catalyst for his martyrdom.

An akathist to Great Martyr-Healer Panteleimon begins:

“Chosen passion-bearer of Christ and gracious healer, who freely grantest healing to the sick, we praise thee in songs as our protector.  As thou hast boldness with the Lord, free us from all harm and sickness who cry with love to thee:

Rejoice, Great Martyr and Healer Panteleimon!

Most Holy Saint and Martyr Panteleimon-the-Healer, intercede to the Most Merciful God for the healing of (names for the healing of his/her) in soul and body.

We know thee, glorious Panteleimon, as an earthly angel and a heavenly man.  For adorned with angelic purity and martyrdom thou hast passed from earth to Heaven, where with angels and all the saints standing before the throne of the Lord of Glory, thou prayest for all of us on earth who venerate thee with these invocations...”

Just as of yesterday, the 28th of May I learned of a miracle, through the intercessory prayers of St. Panteleimon to Christ our God, in the life of Mrs. H.  Upon visiting the Cleveland Clinic, her doctors were happy to report that there is no trace of cancer.  It is believed that she did suffer a mild stroke; a full recovery is expected.

Glory to God for all things.  Glory to Thee!

*Photo is a shrine to St. Panteleimon at Holy Cross Monastery in Wayne, WV

PS.  Just in the short amount of time since I've posted this, Fr. Andrew, our assistant priest at St. George Cathedral,  has informed me of yet another miraculous cure of cancer in our parish!   Praise God!!  This is a quote from Fr. Andrew regarding this latest information:

"The smart medical people I've talked to tell me that the only way these could have been medical flukes or mistaken diagnoses would be for multiple doctors, labs, and high-tech medical machines to have been wrong multiple times in a row over the course of weeks and months."

Wise Words for this Memorial Day

Interview with Jean

I became acquainted with Jean through a mutual friend a few years ago.  Since that time, I've been blessed to know her better through church and am inspired by her faithfulness and humility.  May her story touch your life and renew the hope we have in Christ our Lord and Saviour, our Great Physician and Healer.  

In what faith or denomination were you raised?

 As a child I attended the Presbyterian Church with my parents and brother. While we were regularly attending and participating in the local church, I cannot say that we were living lives of faith in God. There was a disconnect between our local and domestic church experience. Apart from an occasional home meal prayer, I have no memory of any family or personal prayer time. Apart from being given a Bible when I was confirmed as a child, I don’t recall anyone in my family, including me reading one. Couple that with affluence and a seriously dysfunctional family situation, it was a recipe for personal disaster. I was grounded in little more than fear and pain. My teen and early college years were tumultuous.

      At a low point in my later college years, I developed a strong urge for something new to fill my voids and mend my heart. I was certain that I’d find it in the church. In the city where I was attending college, I began attending the Presbyterian Church to search for what I soon realized was God. During that time I met my future husband. He seemed to be a devout Roman Catholic Christian whose religious actions motivated me more in my search. I resisted his initial invitations to attend Mass, but as my affection for him grew, my resistance to attend lessened. I began attending Mass with him on a regular basis. When we decided to marry, it made sense to me to join the Catholic Church so as to be unified in our faith – especially when we considered raising children.

      When I joined the Roman Catholic Church, in 1988, I was certain that I’d discovered the one and true faith. I gravitated toward the legalistic indoctrination and religious practices. I soon found myself in groups of similarly minded people. I was determined to live my life as a devout Catholic. Unfortunately, I had developed a view of God from the same psychological perspective that I had with an abusive adult in my life. I was in a position for spiritual demise.

      Twelve years of a harmful marriage relationship, lack of a proper family support system, poor spiritual guidance from the church, an unhealthy view of God, ignorance of prayer and scripture and the stresses of being determined to love and raise my children in a Godly manner in my brokenness, were all taking its toll on me. I had managed a lifetime of masking my pain as I was dying on the inside. Exhausted with my life, I literally cried out to God in desperation. I knew that He existed and hoped that He would help me. My simple prayer became the point in time when a merciful, loving and compassionate God reached down from Heaven to pull me out of the pit that I was in.

      Instead of changing my difficult circumstances and the harmful people around me, God used the stress of my situations to keep me close to Him. The process of changing me from within had finally begun. For the past eight years I have made a daily conscious effort to yield myself to His will and grow in His grace. As a result of my commitment to Christ, many glorious and tragic things have occurred.

 The Lord has taken me on an unusual faith journey. There have been people from various Christian backgrounds that the Lord has used to teach and develop me as a Christian. I have learned to respect all of my brothers and sisters in Christ.

I struggled to remain in the Catholic Church until September 2007, when it became unbearable for me to stay.

 How, or by whom, were you introduced to the Orthodox Church?

 My invitation to the Orthodox Church came numerous times during the year of 2007 from a dear friend and sister in the Lord. She and I met in 2001, when we both attended the Roman Catholic Church. She has been instrumental in my personal and spiritual development. She had recently been chrismated in the Orthodox Church and was urging me to attend Divine Liturgy with her, knowing well my frustrations with the Catholic Church. In September of 2007, I finally agreed to attend a Divine Liturgy service.

 What were your first impressions? What kept you coming to church?

What totally surprised me was the glorious realm of worship that I was able to enter into upon attending my first Divine Liturgy! After a few more Divine Liturgies, I was hooked. I was spiritually mature enough to know that if I was being fed the properly divided Word of God, could receive Holy Communion and was in an environment conducive to prayer and worshipping God, then that’s where I needed to be.

 What events led to your Chrismation? i.e., books you read, spiritual mentors, prayer, etc.

 Not long after I began attending the Orthodox Church, I made an appointment to speak with the pastor. I wanted to introduce myself to him, tell him a bit of my spiritual journey and let him know that I was prayerfully considering the Orthodox faith. Father told me that he would soon begin his classes to introduce people to the Orthodox faith, so I attended them.  Nearing the conclusion of those classes Father asked me if I would like to be Chrismated on December 21, 2007. My response was one of great joy –absolutely! I was longing to receive Holy Communion and knew I’d found my proper Christian home.       

      Given that reading the Bible is the most important reading that we as Christians can do, the best Orthodox book that I’ve ever purchased is the 2008 Orthodox Study Bible. It is a wonderful blend of scripture with some interpretation, as well as some Orthodox writings, teachings and icons throughout.

 Did you encounter any theological obstacles when you were a catechumen? If so, would you share how you overcame this hurdle?

 My introductions to the history and teachings of Orthodox Christianity (as well as the various Orthodox faith educational opportunities that have followed) have not created any obstacles for me. They have instead, removed some barriers created primarily by some misguided Roman Catholic teachings. As the Holy Spirit enlightens me, I gain greater liberty in Christ Jesus as a result.

 What new insights have you gained about yourself and your beliefs since coming home to the Ancient Faith?

 It seems as though during my brief Orthodox faith journey I have experienced greater spiritual clarity. I have been blessed by God with some Holy, mystical experiences during my past eight years in particular, that have not only heightened my awareness of the reality of a sovereign God as Father, Son and Holy Spirit along with His Holy Saints and Angels, but have also served to strengthen my resolve to love Him with all of my heart, mind and soul and to love my neighbor as myself.

      Apart from God’s mercy and grace, and some faithful friends, I would not be able to bear my personal tragedies that have landed me squarely in demonic battles. That may sound odd to some, but read Ephesians 6:12 - “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against rulers of darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.” This is a reality of our earthly lives – some of us more than others. Christ assures us that we will suffer persecutions as a result of following Him, but He also assures us that He will never leave nor forsake us in the process. I can attest to His faithfulness in every challenge that I have faced.

 I read your letter with great interest in the last church newsletter. Would you share your testimony of healing with us?

 In the midst of my most difficult circumstances is precisely where the Lord has chosen to do many works of healing, deliverance and salvation in my life. One such healing that I had believed God for manifested during the course of Lent with its completion at some point during Holy Week of 2008. (Lent and Holy Week are basically seven weeks of heightened spiritual preparation for Pascha/Easter.)

      As Lent began, I asked an Orthodox Church friend to pray that God would heal me of a specific illness. She was going to the church for the daily Holy Hour. She reported having prayed for me and also sought the intersession of Saint Raphael of Brooklyn as well. Following that, I felt strongly led of the Holy Spirit to attend each remaining Lenten Holy Hour (in addition to the other church services that I was attending) to pray before the Lord in church and that  in doing so I would be healed.

      Like the woman with the issue of blood (Mark 5: 25-34) I had enough faith to believe that if I could just “touch the hem of His garment” I would be made well. My small act of obedience led to being totally healed of a lifelong, genetic illness that had required a daily medication. I keep the last prescription bottle as a reminder of God’s goodness and faithfulness.

 What is a common misconception about the Orthodox Church that you would like to address?

 Something I found of interest during my initial classes of the Orthodox faith, was to learn that in the history of the Orthodox Christian Church, it wasn’t until the eleventh century when the Bishop of Rome (Western Church) separated himself from the other Bishops of the world (Eastern Church) to form what we now refer to as the Roman Catholic Church. The Church of the East is the Orthodox Church. Then, in the sixteenth century the fragmentation of the Roman Catholic/Western Church began with the Protestant Reformation. Only the Orthodox Church remains as the one, united church for the past two thousand years.

      Also, I think  a common misconception is that Orthodox Christians worship the Mother of God or other Saints of God. In my very basic way of  understanding, we are to live in communion with God and His Saints (“cloud of witnesses” – Hebrews 12:1). We venerate (not worship) the Saints. We seek to imitate their Holy lives and ask for their intercessory prayers. Most people would not hesitate to ask a friend to pray for them. How much more efficacious the prayers from the Holy Mother of God or another one of God’s beloved Saints who remain eternally in His presence? 

 What do you love most about the Church? Divine Liturgy in particular?

My practice of the Orthodox faith embodies all of what God has fashioned me to be as a Christian. The Church provides a healthy balance of community, through daily worship and service to others, as well as personal time with God in order that your soul (mind, will and emotions) and spirit might be fed. I am encouraged to live life fully in Christ Jesus without compromising the tenants of the faith. I find myself being continuously challenged to grow in my faith – encouraged to push myself beyond my place of comfort and move closer to God.

The Divine Liturgy is the highlight of the weekly services. It is where I can lay my cares and concerns on the strong shoulders of Christ Jesus. It is where I place my life and the life of my loved ones in the Father’s loving hands. It is a place where I repent of my sins and implore His mercy. It is a place of worship in the Holy Spirit where I am fed the Word of God in two ways – as scripture and as the precious body and blood of Jesus in Holy Communion. It is a place where time and time again, I consecrate my entire life unto Him

How do you share the treasures of the Ancient Faith with those you meet in day-to-day life?

My challenge is not just in loving God when I am alone with Him in prayer, reading His Word or in some other way in fellowship with Him. My greatest challenge is living every part of my life in such a manner that will bring God glory, honor and praise. It is in being faithful to God. It is in demonstrating my faith by serving others wherever God has positioned me. It is in giving to others whatever God has given to me. It is ultimately in seeking to lead others to Christ.

            On my desk, I keep “A Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi” card that many people are probably familiar with. I keep it as a reminder of how I should strive to live my life. I think it summarizes what I am trying to say. It goes as follows: 

 "O Lord, Make me an instrument of your peace;  Where there is hatred, let me sow love;  When there is injury, pardon;  Where there is doubt, faith;  where there is despair, hope;  Where there is darkness, light;  And where there is sadness, joy.  Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;  To be understood, as to understand, To be loved as to love;  For it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life."

*Picture above is an icon of the Theotokos, a Greek term for the Virgin Mary meaning "God-Bearer".  Jean wished to honor the Theotokos, who is a close mother and intercessor for her.  

A Peaceful Retreat at Holy Cross

At the end of April, I visited Holy Cross Monastery with over 30 of my fellow parishioners from St. George Orthodox Cathedral.  The trip was organized by our Young Adult Fellowship and led by Fr. Andrew Damick. 

We spent the better part of a sunny Saturday touring the monastery grounds, listening to Fr. Seraphim speak on spiritual topics, participating in a moleben where our suffering loved ones were brought before the Lord in prayer, and visiting the Monastery Gift Shop.   

We also enjoyed a delicious lunch with the monks, in silence, as is their custom, while another monk read a spiritual book aloud.   Fr. Segius, who graciously led the tour, showed us the bell tower, the chapel where we learned about their patron saint, St. Panteleimon, the room where incense is rolled by hand in the traditional Athonite style, and he pointed out the small cells that dotted the landscape where the monastics live.   

As we made our way over to the beautiful outdoor chapel, Fr. Sergius spoke to us about the monastic life, their daily routine and answered various questions from our group.   The weather could not have been more agreeable, with plenty of sunshine and gentle breezes to animate the flowering dogwoods. 

Fr. Seraphim, the Abbot of Holy Cross, is such a warm and welcoming host.  His face radiates with kindness and wisdom is in his eyes.  He spoke to us about nourishing our spiritual life and used the verse from Revelation 3:20, "Behold, I stand at the door and knock.   If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me."  to illustrate the fact that God is always present seeking us. 

It was heartwarming to listen to Fr. Seraphim recount the early days of the monastery’s move to rural West Virginia from Missouri in 2000.  He shared some humorous anecdotes from this mostly Baptist community curious about their new Russian Orthodox neighbors.  He also talked about the kind deeds of these same neighbors who, after becoming acquainted with and embracing the hermitage,  have helped wayward pilgrims to find the route to the monastery.   

At the end of our visit, Fr. Seraphim spoke with us again regarding our prayer life.  He shared with us a quote that I will paraphrase from one of the Church Fathers;  ‘If you pray and doubt God hears you or that He will answer your prayers, you aren’t really a Christian.’   Those are strong words which gave me pause to consider my own thoughts on the power of prayer.  He encouraged us to make a daily habit of prayer, even if it is just saying the Jesus Prayer, “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”  before we begin our day.  

 I was thankful to have the time to linger at the close of our retreat.  I walked the grounds, visiting the goat herd, taking photos and soaking up the serenity.  I very much look forward to my next visit.  

God Grew Tired of Us

I’m loving Netflix. I signed up a few weeks ago and really enjoy the opportunity to watch films that are not readily available at BlockBuster or the public library. Last week we watched God Grew Tired Of Us, a documentary that won both the Grand Jury Prize Award and also the Audience Award at the 2006 Sundance Film Festival.

The story documents the atrocities of the bloody civil war in Sudan and the subsequent escape of over 20,000 boys (most under the age of 15), dubbed “The Lost Boys” to a refugee camp in Africa. Their barefoot journey across desert land into Kenya is nothing short of miraculous and to witness the camaraderie among survivors, inspirational.  

The story follows a few of the Lost Boys who are welcomed into America to re-settle; some seek a college education and others work various jobs to send money back to the camps to help their struggling friends. Observing America from ones who are new to electricity, running water and supermarkets, let alone airplanes, cell phones, t.v. and all the glitz of the USA, was endearing ..and, at times, insightful into our own cultural failings.

I watched this with my husband and our son and we all gained something from it. With the spotlight on what has happened in Sudan, and the themes of perseverance, love and resiliency, this is a documentary to watch more than once. It’s rated PG for thematic elements and some disturbing images although I would recommend it especially for young people who, if anything like our own children, would benefit greatly by learning of realities outside their comfortable lives. 

Interview with Nina

The following interview is with my friend, Nina, whom I’ve known for several years through an Orthodox online community, Monachos.   Nina has taught me much about the Orthodox faith, including the lives of the saints and the wonder of her own testimony being raised under communism.    Nina’s love for God and the encouragement she offers to others are continually inspiring;  I’m blessed to call her a friend.

The icon above depicts St. Euphrosyne (pronounced you-FROZE-uh-nee) of Moscow, Nina's patron saint.

1) Where were you born and in what church were you raised?

I was born in Albania before communism collapsed, therefore religion was still banned. My family was Christian Orthodox.

2) What was your relationship like with God when you were a child? i.e, your ideas of Him, your experience of Him, what you were taught about communicating with Him?

When I was a child I did not know things about God. We were taught by communist propaganda that God did not exist. However my family (especially my grandparents) were exercising their right to religion secretly and often I would be present during such moments. These are very blessed moments in my life because this is how God called me; He showed compassion and called me through the example of the adults in my family when they were caring for their spiritual needs.

Things I learned about Orthodoxy (not directly about God) I can classify in two groups: 

a) Incidental. b) Purposeful 

In the first group belong stories when I was present by chance where there were talks, or events about Orthodoxy such as the case of my grandmother talking to her cousins and trying to figure out the saint's feastday and who was celebrating on that particular day -since they had to rely on memory because there were no religious calendars. 

In the second group I would include moments like the time when my grandfather gave me my first cross (which was made clandestinely by my uncle) and told me to hide it underneath my clothes at all times, or when grandmothers told me fairytale or chanted hymns which were from the Bible and the Church and I had no idea what these were and I was taught not to repeat them, or say them outside the house (for fear of persecution).

3) Was there ever a time in your life that you didn’t believe in God? If so, what or who convinced you otherwise?

Yes there was. When I started to read at three years old, I started also being brainwashed with the communist propaganda that there is no God. So that were my belief for some years as a child. However often at night before going to sleep I would ponder about metaphysical issues. 

I could not comprehend that from being and existing I would vanish into non-existence after death... And I would start crying silently and go to sleep. I believe these were seeds planted in my soul by God given the circumstances we lived, therefore this was another way of Him calling me to believe in Him. However it is not easy when you do not even know that there is a God, or that the word God even exists since many things were censured at that time. Therefore He decided that at some point it was good for me to learn and encounter Him. 

One day, when I was visiting with my maternal grandparents, I was in their front yard talking to my friends and discussing about the creation of the world. I told them all about the Big Bang theory and also added (as it was taught and written in the text books) that the theory that God created the world it is not true since there is no God. 

While I was so passionately talking to my friends and "teaching" them, my grandfather who must have heard my speech asked me to go and talk to him. My friends left and my grandfather talked with me for a while. I resisted a lot. However after some logical explanation which my grandfather told me, God entered my heart and has never left since! Thank God and may He bless the soul of my grandfather for being His tool for my soul's salvation. 

4) I know through our friendship that you are very knowledgeable about Orthodoxy and the saints in particular. Who is your patron saint? 

My patron Saint is Saint Euphrosyne. There are several of them and I feel connected to all of them and ask for their intercessions always. 

5) When did you come to live in the United States?

More than a decade ago.

6) Could you describe some of the differences in worshipping in Albania and the United States?

There are no essential differences. Differences are only behavioral, or cultural. Ah and the language is different. Also in Tirana I attended the Cathedral and the Archbishop was leading the Liturgy and there were priests, monks, deacons. In my present parish we have one priest (for about 500 families) and recently a deacon was assigned to our parish also. Thank God because our priests work non-stop and it is a very demanding job.

7) What do you love most about the Church? about Divine Liturgy in particular?

The Church is my Home. I can not really pinpoint what I like most about it... Divine Liturgy is also beautiful and each moment is so meaningful and expresses our entire Faith, and God's love for humanity. The Liturgy here is the Divine Liturgy that happens in Heaven where angels sing praises to our God.

8) Being recently married, could you describe some elements from the Orthodox wedding ceremony for readers who may be completely unfamiliar?

As the priest who crowned us said to the guests (the majority of whom were not Orthodox Christians) in the church: "What do we do in a wedding? We celebrate the couple, we dance, we eat, we drink. All these happen also during the Orthodox wedding ceremony." 

There is the blessing of the rings and the betrothal before the couple is crowned. And after the couple is crowned the common cup (symbolizing the common life the couple will share) with wine is given by the priest and afterward the dance of Isaiah around the altar takes place, during which the hymn: "Isaiah dances..." is chanted and the couple and the sponsor all connected to the priest and the Gospel leading the way circle the altar three times. 

9) What resources would you suggest to someone interested in learning about the ancient faith?

It depends on the preferences of different people. For me personally, hagiography (lives of saints) was very crucial when learning about Orthodoxy since it gave me plenty of examples to admire and motivated me. Lives of Saints are Orthodoxy in practice. Also attending Divine Liturgy and other Services of the Church is a very profitable way to learn more. I would also recommend books, and online material and talking to Orthodox priests and believers. 

10) How do you share the treasures of the Orthodox faith with people you meet in day-to-day life?

I try to keep in mind the saying from a Church Father who said: "Daily preach the Gospel, if necessary use words." However it is very difficult for me, the sinner that I am, to be able to preach the Gospel through my actions. 

Remembering the Martyrs Under Communism

"A flower, if you bruise it under your feet, rewards you by giving you its perfume"

Richard Wurmbrand

Previously, I shared with you a saint, Pastor Wurmbrand, the founder of Voice of the Martyrs.

Pastor Wurmbrand was a Romanian evangelical minister who spent 14 years in communist prisons including three years in solitary confinement.  His book, Tortured for Christ, had a profound effect on my life, as it widened the scope of my understanding of God and theosis.   Even after 32 years of christianity, I saw myself as an infant, not comprehending the love as evidenced in the lives of those who have suffered for Christ.

As far as I know, he is not officially canonized in any church, I call him a saint because of his extraordinary testimony to the power of love through our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.   As 2009 marks a centennial celebration of his life, I wanted to share a recently discovered video of Pastor Wurmbrand.  In this clip, he is telling his own story of being in solitary confinement in a communist prison and the truths he experienced that are for all christians.

As we go through the prayers and services of Holy Week in our free countries, let us remember those who have suffered for Christ in hostile nations.  May his memory be eternal!

Interview with Fr. Andrew

I am honored to share with you an interview with Rev. Fr. Andrew S Damick, our assistant pastor at St. George Orthodox Cathedral. I appreciate his time, especially considering his full schedule during Great Lent and pray that his insights and experiences may bless you. Thank you, Fr. Andrew, for being so approachable and willing to share your faith and testimony with others.  

1) How were you first introduced to the Orthodox Church?

" My introduction to Orthodox Christianity was on the Internet, back in 1997.  In those days, the web was small enough that one could read just about everything there on Orthodoxy within the space of a few weeks.  What got me looking was a brief comment on the Orthodox Church in a conversation with a friend who was telling me that he was planning on becoming Roman Catholic.  In the course of the chat, the Orthodox Church was mentioned -- I don't recall if it was by me or by him -- and that stuck in my mind long enough so that I did a search online for any information I could find.

Unless there's no other option, I wouldn't recommend an introduction to Orthodoxy via the Internet these days, because there are now so many people representing themselves as Orthodox who may not actually be or who are associated with the Church for secular reasons.  As with everything on the Internet, caveat lector.

Eventually, I found myself on an email group dedicated to discussions between Orthodox Christians and Evangelical Protestants.  I asked a number of questions there, and after some time, I received an email from one of the members inviting me to church (we lived in the same city).  My first visit to an Orthodox Church was to a tiny Russian Orthodox mission with about ten members borrowing a chapel in an Episcopalian administrative building.  It was humble in almost every sense of the word, but I saw Heaven meet Earth there that Sunday morning.  Nothing afterward was ever the same.

Two weeks later, found myself in an Antiochian parish which was closer to my home.  The pastor and the people were warm, welcoming and ready to answer my questions.  I stayed and was received into the Church six months later."


2) In what denomination were you raised? and, how, if any , did those early experiences prepare you for Orthodoxy?

" I was not raised in a single denomination, especially because my family moved around so much (I've moved 19 times in my nearly 34 years).  Many of the churches we attended were independent, Baptist-style churches, along with a number of bona fide Baptist churches belonging to the Southern Baptist Convention or others.  We also attended a Grace Brethren church when I was in high school.  For about three years in the early 1980s, we went to a different church every weekend -- my parents were missionaries raising support.

The greatest contribution from my Christian upbringing was a genuine love for Christ imparted by my parents, who also saw to it that I received a strong Christian identity that had no problem being different from the rest of the world.  One of the memories which sticks strongly with me was the footwashing and agape meal rituals that the Grace Brethren practice before receiving communion together. Though they don't understand these things sacramentally, it helped to prepare me for liturgical worship in that I saw that deep meaning could be found in ritual, which is by no means "empty." "



3) Has there ever been a time in your life when you didn’t believe in God? And, if so, what convinced you otherwise?

" There never was a time that I declared myself an atheist, though I functioned as one a few years in the beginning of college (I was an undergraduate for seven years, working on two majors and three minors; I eventually dropped one of the majors just a semester shy of finishing it).  My family was attending an Evangelical mega-church, whose Sunday morning worship consisted of a short pop-rock concert followed by 45-60 minute sermon.  I believed I was "saved," and so I lost sight of what else I could actually do as a Christian.  There seemed to be no real progress to make, not in any critical sense. What is "growth" when Heaven and salvation are not at stake?

As a result, I began to drift from church, and I would work on Sunday mornings fairly often.  Prior to the catalyst conversion mentioned above with my incipient Roman Catholic convert friend, there began to be a slow preparation for the search for beauty and worship.  I expressed this longing one time at a college student Bible study I attended and was mostly met with blank stares.

So, while I wasn't an atheist in terms of my belief, I acted like one.

The only logical consequence I could see to the theology that I'd received (particularly the "once saved, always saved" element) was that I was "saved" and there was nothing left for me to do spiritually but wait for Heaven.  What changed my mind was my encounter with Orthodoxy, which teaches that salvation is a dynamic process that takes one's whole life and continues even into eternity.  "Going to Heaven when you die" is really only one small step in a much larger journey of communion with God and becoming by grace what Christ is by nature.

The irony is that, while I was raised with the idea of a "personal relationship with Jesus," I really didn't find anything that functioned like an actual relationship until I came face to face with His Church."



4) What author, or other person(s), was the most influential in your conversion to the Orthodox faith?

" My theological "awakening" began with reading a few works by C. S. Lewis as a teenager and young man.  That led me to want a serious faith with some actual solidity to it.  Of course, Lewis, so much beloved by Evangelicals, would hardly be considered one of them if they actually had gone to church with him.  He was essentially a sort of Anglo-Catholic (in current terms, though he was just a normal Anglican in his own day), believing in things like the reality of the Eucharist and even Purgatory (of course, the Orthodox part ways with him on the latter of those two and a few other items).

I also read "Becoming Orthodox" by Fr. Peter Gillquist, which, while it is simple in its approach, very much appealed to me as a Baptist-leaning Evangelical.  It really started me thinking, and then I read "The Orthodox Church" and "The Orthodox Way," both by Kallistos (Timothy) Ware.  I also read "For the Life of the World" by Fr. Alexander Schmemann, which brought light for me onto why Christianity must be sacramental.

Probably the most influential person in my conversion was Fr. Nicholas Sorensen, the parish priest at my home parish.  He took a brash, egotistical young man and brought him into Orthodoxy.  I still have the same weaknesses, but thanks to people like Fr. Nicholas, I know there's actually a point to struggling against them."



5) What theological obstacles did you face as a catechumen, if any?

" The biggest issue for me was the relationship between faith and works. I mostly dealt with it before I became a catechumen, but it had been so ingrained in me for so many years that the two were opposed that it took a minor miracle before I could in any sense see their true connection.  There was no logical argument that lead me to conclude that they were not opposed, but rather experience of worshiping in an Orthodox manner showed me that opposing them made no sense.  Of course one cannot earn salvation!  But to sit back and just wait for God to bestow it on me without any cooperation on my part other than mere assent makes no sense either.  Such an approach implies that God gives me free will for one moment only and then violates it at all other times.

I really had no problems with the usual things that normally give Protestant converts difficulty:  venerating Mary and the saints, icons, sacraments, hierarchy, etc.  I think that my theological imagination had been so shaped by reading men like Lewis and Tolkien that I had a built-in longing for the holy in terms of the physical. The truth of the Incarnation makes a Christian faith with a physical side to it completely logical."



6) When and how did you know that you were called to the priesthood?

" People ask me this every so often, and I really have no good answer. There was no moment that I knew, except perhaps when the bishop put the Eucharist into my hands just after ordaining me!  For me, it was something of a growing realization, and at some point (not sure when), I found that my desires to be (first) a musical theatre writer and director and (later) a professor of English literature had been replaced with a desire for the priesthood.

The priesthood is really the only thing that remotely fulfills everything I have ever loved my whole life:  Christ, poetry, music, beauty, truth, care for others, conversation, etc.  I'm not really as enthused about the administrative part of it, but thank God, that's not critical to the ordination!  That can always be delegated where necessary."



7) What new insights have you gained about your calling during your time at St. George Orthodox Cathedral?

" One of the difficult lessons I have learned since my conversion and during my time at the cathedral has been that piety is not equal to faith.  There are people who have one without the other.  Ideally, both should work together and each should inform the other, but they are not the same thing.

I've also learned from my mentor here, Fr. Olof Scott, that not every hill is worth dying on.  The wise man tries to pick the ones worth charging up and leaves the rest alone.  With some, you tunnel under.

One of my greatest joys in emerging from the rarefied seminary life into parish life has been the discovery that people really do yearn for the Gospel.  It can be easy to lose sight of that in seminary, and it feeds my soul to see people meet Christ and grow in their love for Him."



8) You have often stated that evangelism is a priority in your ministry. What positive changes in this area have you witnessed in the Orthodox Church over the last few years? What still needs to be addressed?

" While there are some encouraging things in Orthodox evangelism over the past number of years, overall, the state of the Orthodox Church, both in America and abroad, is absolutely terrible in this regard. There are of course historical reasons for this, but our first fathers in the faith lived in times far more difficult than our own and yet still managed to turn the Roman Empire upside down.

I am encouraged, however, both in what I've seen in our parish here and elsewhere.  People are becoming more serious about their faith. The percentage of Sunday-only Christians is shrinking in the face of a growing awakening of the people of God.  Many new parishes are being founded, dedicated not to the preservation of a national culture but to the expansion of the new nation, the Christian race, which welcomes every human being into it and shares the one common Blood of Christ.

It fascinates me to see that people who become serious about their faith almost automatically begin to invite people to church and to share with them Christ's power and energy.  As such, while I do believe that there is an urgent need to train all parishioners to become missionaries, I believe firmly that the first step in that training is the formation of a strong, consistent and frequent worship life informed by a vigorous education in the doctrine and practice of our faith.  These are the things I've tried to do in my priesthood and will continue to do, God willing. "



9) To someone who is from another faith or denomination who is interested in Orthodoxy, what resources would you suggest?

" There is no better resource than a visit to an actual Orthodox Christian worship service.  That's where we do the real work of our faith.  Nothing can ever substitute for an encounter with real Orthodox Christians.  Ours is an incarnate faith, not something one can learn from a book.

If people are interested in reading something, however, the books I mentioned above by Gillquist and Ware are of course fine introductory material.  ("The Orthodox Church" is more informational and educational, while "The Orthodox Way" is more formational and "spiritual.")  I also highly recommend "Beginning to Pray" by Anthony Bloom, which is easy to read but genuinely profound, as well as Schmemann's "For the Life of the World," which shows how the only bulwark against secularism really is a Christianity expressed in sacrament and the holiness of the physical."


*Photo is courtesy of Fr.Andrew, from October 2006 when he was ordained to the holy priesthood in the Orthodox Church by His Grace, Bishop Antoun (Khouri) of Miami and Southest at All Saints Orthodox Church in Raleigh, NC.

Upcoming Interviews

For a while now, I’ve wanted to share with you a few individuals that have blessed my life. These are people who radiate light from heaven and who, in a multitude of ways, have enriched my understanding and experience of God. I am pleased that several of them have agreed to be interviewed for this blog and I’ll be sharing their words with you soon. Through their unique gifts and triumphs in life, I hope to bring you a measure of joy, wonder, and comfort in your journey with Christ. Stay tuned!

St. Melangell

One of the many treasures Orthodoxy has brought to my life has been the doorway to the lives of the saints.  Before discovering the ancient faith, I had only a vague notion

 of those men and women whose lives shone forth the light of Christ.  

Nowadays I am introduced to a new saint on a regular basis.  Sometimes through church or Ancient Faith Radio or a book I’m reading.  Occasionally I find someone new while surfing the net perusing the latest works of my favorite artists.  With each new discovery I find such interesting tidbits and places to include on that “Must See!”  list.  

While browsing Patricia Banker’s latest pieces (pictured above), the beautiful illustration and story of Saint Melangell (pronounced Mel - eng - eth) captivated me.    She is a 7th century saint from Wales that renounced her royal heritage to live in the forest and devote her days to prayer and solitude.  

As the traditional story is told, she fled from her father when pressed to marry and settled in Pennant, at the head of the Tanant Valley in Northern Wales.  There she lived for 15 years in solitude until she was discovered by the Welsh Prince, Brochfael Ysgithrog while he was hunting in the area.   As his hounds pursued their prey, the frightened hare ran to St. Melangell and hid in the folds of her garment.  The hounds were quiet and refused to snag the hare, much to the amazement of the prince.  

Prince Brochfael was so moved by her beauty, purity and love for God that he asked her to marry him.  When she refused, he gifted her with a large parcel of land to be used as a monastery and sanctuary for people and animals.  This area became known as Pennant Melangell and the beautiful saint became Abbess of a religious order there.  Pilgrims still visit this sacred area even to this day.  

According to the St. Melangell’s Church website, there has been a christian church in this area of the Berwyn Mountains for over 1200 years.  St. Melangell’s Church (pictured below), a simple Norman structure, has been beautified over the years with the most recent rebuilding being completed in 1990.   With the blend of Celtic and Romanesque motifs, 15th century carvings, bronze statuary and a natural outdoor landscape with ancient Yew trees, I could breathe in this piece of heaven for several days. 

St. Melangell remains the patron saint of hares and other small animals as well as the natural environment.  In Wales, St. Melangell's feast day is celebrated on May 27th; the ancient feast day is marked as January 31st.

Other related links of interest:  Saints Preserved

and Saints Mary & Martha Orthodox Monastery

Green Bank, Paper Airplanes and Litmus Paper

A Tribute to an Incredible Boy

Last Tuesday, on St. Patrick’s Day, I spent a beautiful day with our son.  He had advanced to the Regional Math Field Day, held at NRAO in Green Bank, WV this year and what a privilege it was for me to be part of this special event!

We began our day around 5:00 am, in order to have breakfast and make the 3 hr. drive north.  The sights were spectacular on Route 92, with dense fog lifting slowly to allow brilliant shafts of morning light to accentuate the tidy farmhouses along the highway.  The air was crisp and while Ben snoozed in the seat beside me, I savored my coffee and the rolling landscape that offered a new discovery around every bend.

Ben is such a neat kid, often quiet, but thoughtful and usually trying to figure out how things work.  He has been this way since he was a toddler and one of our favorite stories is of him at Colonial Williamsburg in Virginia.  We were on a tour of the historic sights and while my husband & I were listening to the guide in the courtyard of the Governor’s Palace, Ben was apart from our group a little bit, standing over a grated drain inlet  with his hands resting on bent knees.  As he peered  intently down that dark shaft, we walked over and said, “What are you doing?”    Without looking up, he continued to study and then our almost 3 yr. old said, “Water down there..”  “Where does it go?”

I love his inquisitiveness and his ability to understand systems and mechanics.  Math and science seem to come easy to him and I am thankful for his gifts.  When he was selected for the County Math Field Day, he barely said a word about it.   And when he placed 3rd at that level, he didn’t want me talking about it.  He considers praise annoying ...and embarrassing if it’s done in front of others.  I admire this quality in him, although it’s been a learning curve for me, as I like to give praise and pats on the back. In talking with other moms, I’m finding this trait common in boys.

At the Observatory, the students tested from 10:15 am to about 3:15 pm with 5 parts to the field day:  Quantity Estimation, Group Activity, Written Test, Mental Estimations and Relays.  The folks at the NRAO were wonderful hosts; providing breakfast items and beverages and also a full lunch for everyone.  The day went smoothly and while Ben was testing, I enjoyed a tour of the Observatory and then sitting in my van, soaking up the sunshine and reading some favorite hymns and prayers of St. Patrick.

All in all, it was a great first experience for the both of us.  And, even though he didn’t earn an award at the end of the day, he said he enjoyed the challenges and would try to go again next year. 

Among Ben’s hobbies, he enjoys making paper airplanes.  He has a book that shows how to make a variety of plane types and more recently, he discovered a website that includes video on how to make even more styles.  When he told us at dinner one night that he could make a rocket out of paper, my husband smiled at him and said, “If you can make a rocket out of paper, you’ll probably work for NASA”.  “I’ll show you” was Ben’s only reply.

And so, after dinner, we watched him take a spherical object he had fashioned out of paper, which included many tucks and folds, outside to the patio.  With a lighter in hand, he placed the small flame near a hole in the paper and WHHHOOOOSHH, it took off across a distance of about 4 feet and did not consume the paper.  We all applauded and asked if he could do it again!  He beamed as he demonstrated his craft a second time.

Ben is also knowledgeable about the fish in his care.  I have finally learned to stop fussing and asking if he remembered to feed them because he has shown me time and again that he is on top of it.  As he was cleaning the tanks one day, I observed from a distance that he was measuring and calculating something, as the bathroom counter looked more like a science lab rather than a place to brush your teeth and comb your hair.   Peering over his shoulder, I saw that he had made his own paper strips to test the pH of the water in his tanks.  “Oh, Ben, ...wow...you made your own pH paper?!”  I asked in wonder.

“It’s called litmus paper, mom” was his matter of fact reply.  It was no big deal to him; he needed to know the pH of the water and so, found a solution.  Simple.

What is nonchalant to him is incredible to me.  I admire this child and am thankful to be him mom. 

"May God grant Ben many, many years, enable him to use his gifts to glorify God's name and grow him in Truth and obedience always."

  

*Photograph is from the NRAO website.

Awake O Sleeper

As I sit here smelling the sweet Nazareth incense from Holy Cross Monastery, my thoughts are on St. Benedict and his Rule. I’ve written about this mighty saint before, but as we are in Great Lent in the Orthodox Church, I find his counsel most appreciated.

Great Lent is a time of increased fasting, prayer and almsgiving, a lean season that balances on the hope of springtime, renewal, and celebration in our Risen Saviour. I do not just want to go through the motions of Lent, I wish to experience Christ, to know the Pascal mystery in a real and intimate way. And through my efforts I am reminded daily of my weaknesses. I eat too much. I ponder too much and waste time too much. I yearn for discipline and yet, on a whim, will snag a second...or fourth Oreo. And these are just the petty things.

A much larger weak spot is my fear of flying. I joke about myself that I pray more on airplanes than any other time in life, but in truth, it’s a real fear that I have to deal with from time to time and it’s BIG, UGLY and RELENTLESS.  

St. Benedict says to “keep death daily before your eyes” (4.47) which I find an easy course when embarking on a plane, but he also says “Look forward to holy Easter with joy and spiritual longing” (49.7) How may I have joy while also contemplating my mortality?

The Christian life is filled with such seemingly contradictory maxims: “ You must lose your life to find it” “Through death, death was destroyed” “By Christ, we are made strong through our weakness” and “Rejoice through suffering, being thankful for our trials”. My quest in reading St. Benedict’s Rule is learning how to live in contradiction, how to be a peaceful pilgrim in this noisy world.

As I face my fear of flying, I realize that I’m led to a place of great vulnerability.  A place I would altogether avoid if circumstances were different. I am awake, attentive to my mortality and roused from a comfortable slumber. I realize how much I desire the mighty wings of God and how illusory is my control in life.

“The promise of the Kingdom is not that we shall escape the hard things, but that we shall be given grace to face them, to enter into them, and to come through them. The promise is not that we shall not be afraid. It is that we need not fear fear.” - Esther de Waal, Living With Contradiction: An Introduction to Benedictine Spirituality

In hindsight, what a blessing to confront this weakness head-on for this is exactly where Christ meets us.  As I continually prayed, “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner” my thoughts changed from an irrational torrent to a calm river of hope.  Through my vulnerability, living waters flowed ...how can I not embrace these occasions of spiritual growth?

Secretariat: Triple Crown Legend

If I was raised and lived far removed from churches, Holy Scripture, or anyone proclaiming Christ, ...I would know God, my Creator, through horses.

I’ve had a love of horses for as long as I can remember and have shared my life with them since age 6. Reading about horses, watching them on t.v., drawing them, spending hours at the barn riding, grooming and listening to them munch hay is a tightly woven part of my life’s tapestry.

I can recall a little motorized toy that my parents bought for me on Christmas one year that allowed me to place each differently colored horse on a little track, press ‘go’ and watch them race over and over again with varying outcomes, much to my delight. 

I spent days outside in the summer reveling in Walter Farley’s Black Stallion series
and actually fell over backward in my lawn chair after throwing my hands in the air, celebratory style, as I read about the conclusion of a long and arduous desert horse race.

It isn’t the sport of racing that appeals to me as much as the opportunity to witness perfection in God’s most noble creature. In fact, there’s much to lament about the sport ...the misuse of drugs, some calloused owners and insurance policies, the questionable breeding and other ethical matters.

What I wish to share with you is the essence of the animal, a heart and spirit that kindles praise to my Creator.

There are times in our life when we can witness perfection or experience it ourselves as God’s grace is given. When we see an athlete such as Terry Fox and his Marathon of Hope or Lyman Bostock who sought to return a salary he felt he didn’t earn, or Troy Polamalu who speaks openly about his love for God, we can gain a sense of something outside of themselves, something greater...something far greater and wonderful. In animals, perhaps even more so since they haven’t the propensity toward sin. Every perfect thing in us is from God above; how glorious when we gain glimpses of the eternal on earth!

I was only a toddler when Secretariat wowed the world with his stamina and heart. But through the recordings of his races and the words of those closest to him, I can share in his amazing life. In watching him run as God created him to do, it is not just thrilling to behold, but deeply humbling in the sense that here, before us, is a glimpse of perfection, of God’s handiwork.

In 1973, Secretariat won each leg comprising the Triple Crown: the Kentucky Derby, The Preakness Stakes and the Belmont Stakes, setting new track records in each and a new world record in the Belmont. Since 1919, we’ve only seen 11 Triple Crown winners...and after the Belmont Stakes, the last and longest of the races at a mile and a half, Pat Lynch remarked:

“It was like the Lord was holding the reins, ..Secretariat was one of His creatures and maybe whispered to him a “Go” and that horse really went. It was really an almost supernatural experience...it really was.” 

--Pat Lynch NY Racing Association 1957-1981
on Secretariat’s performance in the Belmont Stakes

*To the best of my knowledge the above image is in public domain; for more information on Secretariat, please visit www.secretariat.com 

Never Quit

My daughter is home from school today with a tummy virus.  We've spent some time working on her skills telling time and reading and then she needed to lay down to rest.  When I asked her if she wanted to watch a movie, mentioning some of our favorites, Cinderella, Little Bear and Bug's Life, she said, "How 'bout the Giant movie?"  

She meant "Facing the Giants" , a film that we discovered several months ago and have watched as a family on several occasions.  It's a Christian film, from an evangelical mindset of a high school football coach's struggle to win, in life and on the field.  It's a great story with themes to warm and encourage the heart no matter your denomination.

I'm posting my favorite scene below:

Victory through Christ; thoughts on St. Terese of Lisieux

I had intended to write about St. Valentine last week, but fierce storms and a power outage that lasted for days altered my plans. We live in a rural area that experiences frequent outages and although it’s fun to live like pioneers for a few hours, I find that it’s more a lesson in patience and self-control. Which brings me round to thinking on St. Terese of Lisieux and her “little way”.  

A Catholic friend recently loaned to me a film about St. Terese’s life. She was known for small acts of kindness and demonstrating what it means to crucify our will in favor of allowing the light of Christ to shine through us. If you’d like to learn more about St. Terese, you might enjoy reading at the Society of the Little Flower website. I didn’t know much about St. Terese before watching the film and now find myself greatly inspired by her life.  

Her life encourages my walk with Christ by helping me to take the high road in everyday circumstances. She reminds me that it is not necessary that I do grand things for God, such as building a cathedral or living among the poor in order to minister to them, but it is necessary that I become aware of my own sins so that I may repent and do small things in a grand way, or more accurately, God’s way.

Small things such as placing my needs behind another’s, listening to someone’s heartaches when you feel pressed for time or even giving a smile or warm words to someone who has been unkind. I experienced a victory through Christ a few days ago that is worth sharing for anyone who may battle a common demon, ... anger.

Anger thrives on haste, self-righteousness and pride. I know my enemy very well and yet struggle to find peace when I know his approach is near. It is only by the grace of God that I am able to turn away and see a different path when all my buttons are pressed and the fuse is at the end. But it so happened a few days back that God quieted my mouth when I experienced hot words and gave me such a taste of sweetness... victory through Christ. I learned that if I can just hang on, over the crest of the wave, there is stillness, peace and mercy on the other side; it’s only in our nearness to our Creator that we are able to forget self, thus foiling our enemy.  

I’m grateful to St. Terese for radiating the love of Christ, for bearing witness to heaven through her selfless acts of love toward others. May God have mercy on me and enable me to call to mind His wondrous saints in times of temptation.  

"I applied myself above all to practice quite hidden little acts of virtue; thus I liked to fold the mantles forgotten by the Sisters, and sought a thousand opportunities of rendering them service."  St. Terese of Lisieux

St. Brigid's Cross

In a popular icon of St. Brigid she is depicted with her handmade cross of rushes.  I have one of these crosses on my living room wall and have found it is usually a conversation piece, with one guest believing it was some sort of ninja tool!   Legend says that the saint formed this cross in order to minister to a dying man; one version goes like this:

"A pagan chieftain from the neighborhood of Kildare was dying. Christians in his household sent for Brigid to talk to him about Christ. When she arrived the chieftain was raving. As it was impossible to instruct this delirious man, hopes for his conversion seemed doubtful. Brigid sat down at his bedside and began consoling him. As was customary, the dirt floor was strewn with rushes both for warmth and cleanliness. Brigid stooped down and started to weave them into a cross, fastening the points together. The sick man asked what she was doing. She began to explain the cross, and as she talked his delirium quieted and he questioned her with growing interest. Through her weaving, he converted and was baptized at the point of death. Since then the cross of rushes has been venerated in Ireland."

I think it's interesting to note that both St. Patrick and St. Brigid utilized elements of nature, shamrocks and rushes, respectively, in order to minister to those seeking the Divine. It calls to mind Romans 1:20, "For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse..."  All the firmament shouts His glory, how much more in the hands of His precious saints!

Menu ideas for St. Brigid's Feast Day

I am not one for adventure cooking.  Because our family likes to eat dinner together, I prefer simple meals that do not involve much forethought.   This time of year, you’ll find such standards as meatloaf, chilli, taco salad, spaghetti, baked pork chops and various soups and salads on the rotating menu.   When it comes to the fancy stuff, I leave that to my husband whose fondest hobby is trying assorted recipes for everything from cornish game hens to guacamole.

Imagine his (and our kids) surprise when he arrived at the dinner table recently to find Boxty Pancakes and Beacán Bruithe (stuffed mushrooms) created by yours truly.  I found the traditional Irish recipes in a  book given to me by my mom titled, Celtic Teas With Friends by Elizabeth Knight and illustrated by Hugh Harrison.  It's a colorful and entertaining little book with rich illustrations and brief commentary that includes bits of history, folklore, recipes and common teatime traditions enjoyed in Wales, Cornwall, Ireland and Scotland.

The recipes were listed in conjunction with a tea for St. Brigid’s Feast Day which is coming up soon on February 1st.  As St. Brigid is my patron saint of course the menu for this particular tea piqued my curiosity and I decided to try a few.    I surprised myself ...I enjoyed making these dishes just as much as eating them!    The boxty pancakes combined mashed potatoes with raw grated potatoes, buttermilk, flour and baking soda and were especially good served up hot out of my cast iron skillet.   My husband went on so about the scrumptious dishes that I think I’ll have to do a little more adventure cooking this year.    I believe I can sense my Nanny's (my late paternal grandmother) smile even as I type that.

With whatever foods you decide to celebrate Super Bowl Sunday, St. Brigid’s Day, may God bless your table with plenty.

Elizabeth: The Golden Age

This movie came out in  2007 and although I didn’t catch it on the big screen, I finally rented it several months ago.  Since hubby & I recently watched David Starkey’s History Channel documentary on Queen Elizabeth, I’m thinking of this lady who so captures my imagination. 

Elizabeth I is one of my heroes, one of those people from history that I am continually intrigued with.  That may sound strange coming from an Orthodox Christian who might easily identify with the Catholic struggle under this Protestant Queen, and yet it is her restraint, her firm resolve to avert the bloodbath that her half-sister Mary had ordained, that fosters my admiration.

Elizabeth:  The Golden Age, starring Cate Blanchett, is the sequel to the 1998 film, Elizabeth, which tells the story, albeit loosely, of the beginning of her reign in 1559.  The Golden Age picks up in the middle of her 45 year reign as the tensions with Roman Catholic Spain were at an all-time high and war was on the horizon.    

I thought the Golden Age was an artistic achievement with rich costumes, authentic sets and ethereal scenes that would make for excellent oils.  In this way, The Golden Age directed by Shekhar Kapur, is superior to its prequel.   And Cate Blanchett simply IS Elizabeth I.  I cannot think of anyone more suitable for the role.    However, that’s about the extent of my praise.

I kept waiting to be awed by this film, by explosive and intelligent speeches, by scenes created to flesh out Elizabeth’s mastery of multiple languages and political finese, but they simply didn’t materialize.   I was left pondering several scenes, wondering if Hollywood had gone too far in manipulating the truth in order to dazzle. Ugh.  The truth of her life is much more dazzling than the scene created of an (erroneous) youthful Elizabeth riding out on a great steed to deliver a powerful speech to encourage her troops to defeat the Spanish Armada.

The personal anguish that Elizabeth must have battled, the realities of being a woman and also a Queen, forever in danger of assassination attempts and plots to overthrow her, is played out well in the film, even if artistic license is taken here as well. 

This personal battle is also why she is a woman I most admire.  Elizabeth made difficult choices and always in the interest of her country, in securing England’s place in the world, in protecting her from the Inquisition.  She ruled during the fire of the Protestant Reformation and showed wisdom when she said, “I have no desire to make windows into mens souls”  as she tolerated Catholicism in her Protestant land.  Although she removed icons as idolatrous, I tend to view her as carrying out her father's desires and standing firm against a corrupt papacy.

All in all, I’d give Elizabeth: The Golden Age a C+ because it’s a beautiful recreation of one of my favorite periods in history but it’s too much symbolism over substance to warrant a hearty applause.

If you’re a fan of Queen Elizabeth I, I’d recommend the History Channel’s  4 part documentary by David Starkey; we found this series at our local library.

Best Wishes

 Congratulations President Obama.

May God grant you health, guidance and wisdom in your service to this great nation.

President Bush,

Thank you for serving the United States of America 

and making decisions

based upon your convictions rather than popular opinion.

THANK YOU for keeping my family safe in the post 9/11 world.

May God bless you and keep you.

Hats off to the Steelers!

What an amazing game last night!  I hope to see the Steelers go all the way to Super Bowl victory =-)  Troy Polamalu made an impressive showing on the field against the Ravens, but did you know he is also an Orthodox Christian?  In an age where we have more news stories about star athletes serving time for  lawless behaviour, it was refreshing to find a Yahoo! Sports interview with Mr. Polamalu at Mind in the Heart blog.

Enjoy!

Snapshot ~ Friday afternoon

I am reading:   Esther de Waal's,  Living with Contradiction: An Introduction to Benedictine Spirituality

I am listening to:  Live Ireland Radio

I am seeing: orders & tasks on my desk to complete

I am thankful for:  a warm house when it’s 11 degrees outside!

I am smelling:  Fred Soll's pinon (desert pine) incense

I am praying for:  family

I have discovered:  that I am slowly grasping what true hospitality means

I am thinking: that holidays and feast days are fully enjoyed when I stop worrying about details and focus on the essence of the celebration

One of my favorite things: coffee friends - those few that know me best and love me anyway!

Mere Consumers?

“Have pity on us for the look of things,

When blank denial stares us in the face.

Although the serpent mask have lied before

It fascinates the bird.”  George MacDonald

The obstinate illusion before us each day is that which shields an honest view of ourselves.  We create masks, those images we want people to see and quietly sweep the ugly stuff under the rug.  Our addictions remain, our justifications all the same...tomorrow we will conquer the clutter in our lives ...tomorrow.   

Fr. Andrew delivered a powerful sermon on Sunday reminding us that our nation sees society as mere consumers, but what does that really say about us as human beings?  Do we live in a disposable world where every material item is easily replaced?  Are we so absorbed by instant gratification that we’re missing what’s real...what’s pure?

From his sermon:

“What are the fruits of this endless appetite for something else to eat, something else to consume, something new and interesting? For one thing, we are often bored. We spend so much of our time voraciously consuming the latest bit of entertainment, gossip, information, politics, and possessions that when we encounter things like beauty, permanence, or—dare I say it?—eternity, our response is “I’m bored.” As consumers, our attention spans get more and more childish.

Our appetite as consumers is such that we don’t just use up entertainment and information, but we also use up people. We see other people primarily in terms of what they can provide us rather than for who they are and the communion we can have with them. This corrupts not only friendships, but also marriages and families. “

Fr. Andrew has posted his full sermon, "Consumption and the Dignity of Man", here.

Praise God for illuminating our darkened hearts and minds, praise the Father of Lights for granting us grace to cast off the mask!

*Painting is by John William Waterhouse, "The Crystal Ball"

Frankincense: Gift of the Magi

When the Magi visit the Christ child, we are told in St. Matthew 2 that they found him in his house, not the cave where the shepherds worshipped him. Theirs was a long and arduous journey in order to worship a King they had never met. Holy Scripture does not say there were three, yet we assume so because of the number of gifts offered.

“And when they had come into the house, they saw the young Child with Mary his mother, and fell down and worshiped Him. And when they had opened their treasures, they presented gifts to Him: gold, frankincense and myrrh.” St. Matthew 2:11

Frankincense has an ancient history, being used in ceremonial and religious rites for more than 5,000 years. It comes from the resin in the bark of the Boswellia tree in areas of the Middle East and I find it interesting to note that it’s such a scraggly yet hardy tree. It has been known to grow amongst solid rock, sinking deep roots about the crevasses in order to survive the harsh wind and sun. Frankincense is harvested by scraping the bark and allowing the resin to bleed forth and harden, forming droplets or ‘tears’. These tears are then used in a variety of ways, some of which we can glean from Holy Scripture.

The Lord gives to Moses in Exodus 30:34-36, a very specific recipe for making incense that He deems holy, which includes sweet spices, onycha, sweet galbanum and pure frankincense. There are several references to frankincense in Isaiah, such as in chapter 60 which speaks of the assembling of the Church from many corners of the earth, turning their eyes to the glory of the Lord and bringing gifts, such as gold and frankincense to “proclaim the good news of the Lord’s salvation”. In Song of Songs, we see this sweet resin used in powders to scent the body and in Revelation 8, we learn that incense is present in heaven, the smoke rising along with the prayers of the saints before God from the angel’s hand. What a magnificent image!

The healing properties of frankincense have made its use common in medicaments and have proven very valuable in the treatment of respiratory ailments; no wonder it has been used for centuries to clarify temples and aid meditation.

How fitting and symbolic that the Magi brought such a kingly gift to our Saviour. One that is created through the wounding of a tree in order to give praise and honor to the One who came to heal us by His wounds...Isaiah 53

Flight into Egypt

“Now when they had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream, saying, “Arise, take the young Child and His mother, flee to Egypt, and stay there until I bring you word;  for Herod will seek the young Child to destroy Him.”

This is a photo, depicting the flight into Egypt, from our Christmas cards this year, purchased from The Printery House.    It caught my eye because of the colors and I like the artistic style.  The card itself is a photo of a mural created in the Basilica of the Immaculate Conception at the Conception Abbey in Missouri, painted by Benedictine monks in the late 19th century.  

The symbolic imagery in the mural piqued my curiosity and this is what I learned:  the crumbling idol in the background is based on Thoth, the Egyptian baboon or monkey god of mathematics, writing and wisdom.  The idol is clutching a writing implement as it topples to the ground while the Holy family passes by.

At the base of the cracked column, you can notice the date 1896, which is when the fresco was painted.  A Lilly-of-the-Valley is blooming near the feet of the Theotokos while poisonous mushrooms grow near the base of the column.

On the Conception Abbey website, it is noted that the donkey's feet are not painted in the proper positioning for walking and yet, I hardly think this detracts from such a splendid portrayal.

I tend to think so much of the Nativity as a moment that stopped time, when the shepherds were near, the cows munched their hay and Blessed Mary knelt in the glow, adoring the newborn King.  In my mind, the star of Bethlehem that led the wise men to worship Christ, is forever held there.  It is good to hear the Gospel every Sunday morning, to be reminded of Jesus’ journey after his miraculous birth...to think on the perilous trek that Joseph and the Blessed Virgin underwent to keep the Christ-child safe.  To think of the wise men who risked so much...

Glory to the newborn King!  

The Cremation of Sam McGee

I discovered the writings of Robert Service on my ’92 visit to Alaska and am sharing a favorite from the land of the midnight sun:

There are strange things done in the midnight sun

By the men who moil for gold;

The Arctic trails have their secret tales

That would make your blood run cold;

The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,

But the queerest they ever did see

Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge

I cremated Sam McGee.

Now Sam McGee was from Tennessee,

Where the cotton blooms and blows.

Why he left his home in the South to roam

‘Round the Pole, God only knows.

He was always cold, but the land of gold

Seemed to hold him like a spell;

Though he’d often say in his homely way

That he’d “sooner live in hell”.

On a Christmas Day we were mushing our way

Over the Dawson trail.

Talk of your cold! through the parka’s fold

It stabbed like a driven nail.

If our eyes we’d close, then the lashes froze

Till sometimes we couldn’t see;

It wasn’t much fun, but the only one

To whimper was Sam McGee.

And that very night, as we lay packed tight

In our robes beneath the snow,

And the dogs were fed, and the stars o’erhead

Were dancing heel and toe,

He turned to me, and “Cap” says he,

“I’ll cash in this trip, I guess; 

And if I do, I’m asking that you

Won’t refuse my last request.”

Well, he seemed so low that I couldn’t say no;

Then he says with a sort of moan:

“It’s the cursed cold, and it’s got right hold

Till I”m chilled clean through to the bone.

Yet ‘tain’t being dead -- it’s my awful dread

Of the icy grave that pains;

So I want you to swear that, foul or fair,

You’ll cremate my last remains.”

A pal’s last need is a thing to heed,

So I swore I would not fail;

And we started on at the streak of dawn;

But God! he looked ghastly pale.

He crouched on the sleigh, and he raved all day

Of his home in Tennessee;

And before nightfall a corpse was all

That was left of Sam McGee.

There wasn’t a breath in that land of death,

And I hurried, horror-driven,

With a corpse half hid that I couldn’t get rid,

Because of a promise given;

It was lashed to the sleigh, and it seemed to say:

“You may tax your brawn and brains,

But you promised true, and it’s up to you

To cremate those last remains.”

Now a promise made is a debt unpaid,

and the trail has its own stern code.

In the days to come, through my lips were dumb,

In my heart how I cursed that load.

In the long, long night, by the lone firelight,

While the huskies, round in a ring,

Howled out their woes to the homeless snows --

O God! how I loathed the thing.

And every day that quiet clay

Seemed to heavy and heavier grow;

And on I went, though the dogs were spent

And the grub was getting low;

The trail was bad, and I felt half mad,

But I swore I would not give in;

And I’d often sing to the hateful thing,

And it hearkened with a grin.

Till I came to the marge of Lake Lebarge,

And a derelict there lay;

It was jammed in the ice, but I saw in a trice

It was called the “Alice May”.

And I looked at it, and I thought a bit,

and I looked at my frozen chum;

Then “Here,” said I, with a sudden cry,

“Is my cre-ma-tor-eum.’

Some planks I tore from the cabin floor,

And I lit the boiler fire;

Some coal I found that was lying around,

and I heaped the fuel higher;

The flames just soared, and the furnace roared --

Such a blaze you seldom see;

And I burrowed a hole in the glowing coal,

And I stuffed in Sam McGee.

Then I made a hike, for I didn’t like

To hear him sizzle so;

And the heavens scowled, and the huskies howled,

And the wind began to blow.

It was icy cold, but the hot sweat rolled

Down my cheeks, and I don’t know why;

And the greasy smoke in an inky cloak

Went streaking down the sky.

I do not know how long in the snow

I wrestled with grisly fear;

But the stars came out and they danced about

Ere again I ventured near;

I was sick with dread, but I bravely said:

“I’ll just take a peep inside.

I guess he’s cooked, and it’s time I looked” ; ...

Then the door I opened wide.

And there sat Sam, looking cool and calm,

In the heart of the furnace roar;

And he wore a smile you could see a mile,

And he said:  “Please close that door.  

It’s fine in here, but I greatly fear

You’ll let in the cold and storm --

Since I left Plumtree, down in Tennessee,

It’s the first time I’ve been warm.”

There are strange things done in the midnight sun

By the men who moil for gold;

The Arctic trails have their secret tales

That would make your blood run cold;

The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,

But the queerest they ever did see

Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge

I cremated Sam McGee.

Nollaig Shona Duit!

"Hail to the King, hail to the King!

Blessed is He, blessed is He.

The peace of earth to Him;

The joy of heaven to Him.

The homage of a King be His,

King of all victory;

The welcome of a Lamb be His,

Lamb of all glory:

the Son of glory down from on high.

All hail, let there be joy!"

May you all have a blessed Christmas!

*Prayer from the Northumbria Community

Poustinia

Poustinia. It’s the Russian word for “desert”, vast areas of sand and sun where the essence of life is reduced to the bare essentials such as finding shelter, water and food in order to survive. Actually, I think it’s better described as a place of liberation; not a reduction of life, but a liberation of life from all the nonessentials.

Poustinia also has a connotation related to the Fathers of the Desert, those first Christian hermits who sought an ascetic life in the harsh climate of the Egyptian deserts during the third century. It means entering a place of contemplation and seeking God in solitude and prayer. And most interesting, it does not have to be a place away from humanity, but may be found in the corner of our homes or driving to work.

Through my Finan* readings for the month of December, this word has become fond and familiar; it has provided a name for a concept I found difficult to describe and define. The poustinia is a place I wish to enter, especially during this time of year when so much is going on around me; I need a place of silence in order to understand the noise. God makes solitude and silence holy. If I don’t stop, if I never take time to be still, if I never actively seek meditation upon His Word, I am missing a vital need. And one that strengthens not only me, but those around me.

"Stand still, and allow the strange, deadly restlessness of our tragic age to fall away like the worn-out dusty cloak that it is -- a cloak that was once considered beautiful. The restlessness was considered the magic carpet to tomorrow, but now in reality we see it for what it is: a running away from oneself, a turning from that journey inward that all men must undertake to meet God dwelling within the depths of their souls."

For me, entering the poustinia, may mean turning off the radio, computer and phone in order to pray and read, or going for a walk and saying prayers. One thing I’ve discovered is that although I feel refreshed and renewed during those first quiet minutes, eventually, I am uncomfortable in the silence. I am uncomfortable when the motives of my heart are laid bare...yet, without discomfort we never grow.

Sometime I would like to extend myself and go away to a little cabin on a snowy mountain that is warm but bare, having no choice of music cd’s or a fat bookshelf, with only water and bread and my bible. I am sure I would enjoy that initial excitement of a new adventure, but it is the stipping away, the liberation of my body from too many comforts, that would be painful ...and blessed.

“Stand still, and look deep into the motivations of life. Stand still, and lifting your hearts and hands to God pray that the mighty wind of His holy Spirit may clear all the cobwebs of fears, selfishness, greed, narrow-heartedness away from the soul: that His tongues of flame may descend to give courage to begin again.”

*Finan readings are from Celtic Daily Prayer from the Northumbria Community.  Quotes are from these readings.

*Photo is from the Madonna House

A measure of God's grace

About 5 years ago I was walking through a valley so deep I couldn’t see the sunlight or feel its warmth;  I wondered if God had abandoned me.  I never quit praying but couldn’t comprehend why He wasn’t helping me through this desolate place.  It was a very lonely time; I came to know that isolation is the devil's playground.  

I learned some valuable lessons through this darkness however:  that we must rejoice for our trials because they draw us nearer to God and give birth to perseverance and that God, in fact, does NOT ever abandon us.  Sometimes we have to cling to Truth in Holy Scripture (Psalm 94) and forsake our feelings which can lead us astray.

It was during one particular wintry day that I recall feeling forlorn, weeping and telling God how much I needed Him, that I was such a weak vessel and needed some reassurance that all would be well.  I felt guilty even as I prayed it, asking God for a sign of His nearness.  As if my very life was not evident enough of His care!

Brewing a cup of tea, I walked by the kitchen window and glanced out at the familiar wooded landscape.  The sky was gray and atmosphere dismal but for a brilliant glimmer that caught my gaze:  5 male cardinals perched together in our spruce tree.  There they were, just sitting near to one another in about 

an arm span in proximity, all looking down toward my window.  I don’t know how long I stood there watching them... they weren’t eating or flitting about, just being still ...peaceful.  

Typically we see cardinals, bluejays, chick-a-dees, tufted titmice, sparrows, wrens, juncos and doves in our yard, but I’ve rarely seen two male cardinals in the backyard at the same time, let alone five sitting together.  And, whether you will interpret it as  mere coincidence or a blessing from heaven, the effect is the same.  For it was in that moment that I felt God’s presence and peace of mind. ..and thanked Him abundantly for it.  If you aren't familiar with the songs and call of the cardinal, listen here.

I’m frequently drawn to reading about the saints who held close relationships with animals, such as St. Seraphim of Sarov who had such grace given to him as to receive a taste of blessedness on earth; his affinity with wild creatures is well known in the Orthodox Church.  Or St. Columba, whose close bond with a horse caused the creature to bid him farewell before his death.  St. Kevin (pictured right) also comes to mind as his icon represents the black birds and other creatures that blessed his life.   It is from the stories of the saints that I believe God can and does minister to us through creation.  ...even those of us who are not saints but love Him and seek His face.

For me anyway, it seems that cardinals often carry a measure of His grace as this is not the only occasion that I’ve been so touched by the little red birds.   Praise God for all creation, in whose hand is the breath of every living thing...

*Cardinal photo courtesy of my friend, Clayton Spangler.

The Gift

My friend, E.B., was just blogging about her best loved Christmas movies and tunes, which prompted me to share one of my favorites of the season, "The Gift", sung by Aselin Debison. The lyrics by Stephanie Davis are posted below. I love the way Aselin carries this song; her small voice is most fitting to illuminate the essence of this beautiful tale.




A poor orphan girl named Maria
Was walking to market one day
She stopped for to rest by the roadside
Where a bird with a broken wing lay
A few moments passed till she saw it
For its feathers were covered with sand
And soon cleaned and wrapped it was traveling
In the warmth of Maria’s small hand
She happily gave her last peso
On a cage made of rushes and twine
She fed it loose corn from the market
And watched it grow stronger with time
Now the gift-giving service was coming
And the church shone with tinsel and light
And all of the townfolk brought presents
To lay by the manger that night
There where diamonds, incense and perfumes
And packages fit for a king
But for one ragged bird in a small cage
Maria had nothing to bring
She waited till just before midnight
So no one would see her go in
And crying she knelt by the manger
For her gift was unworthy of him
Then a voice spoke to her through the darkness
”Maria, what brings you to me?
If the bird in the cage is your offering
Open the door, let me see”
So she trembled, she did as he asked her
And out of the cage the bird flew
Soaring up into the rafters
On a wing that had healed good as new
Just then the midnight bells rang out
And the little bird started to sing
A song that no words could recapture
For its beauty was fit for a king
Now Maria felt blessed just to listen
To that cascade of notes sweet and long
As her offering was lifted to heaven
By the very first nightingale’s song

Velvet Steel

Because I am frequently asked about my avatar, pictured left, I thought it might be good to blog about.  When asked why I don’t post a picture of myself for my profile, the short answer is:  

I’m not keen on posting my mug on the internet.

The long answer is:

I’ve been using this symbol of the sword and soft cloth, this artwork by Alan Ayers, for about 5 years now on various internet places as it well represents what I’m about or rather, what I’m striving toward.  

Much earlier than this, I was sitting in a small rural Baptist Church one Sunday morning when the pastor gave a moving sermon in which he used a striking metaphor.  He likened our spiritual growth in Christ as “velvet-steel” and this created a vivid mental image for me, one in which the reality of theosis or some might say, sanctification, is clear.

Velvet-Steel simply means to have the words of God inscribed upon my heart so firmly as to be unwavering, unyielding as steel.  And yet, to be enfolded in gentleness, kindness, peace, love and humility so that those I meet may be inclined to know the sword, the Truth.

Treasures on our bookshelf

The Real St. Nicholas:  Tales of Generosity and Hope From Around the World, translated and edited by Louise Carus is a new treasure on our bookshelf.  I was looking round Amazon for a children’s book which told the story of the real St. Nicholas, the 4th century Bishop from Myra, when this eye-catching cover snagged my attention.

The Real St. Nicholas is a beautiful book, with colorful and varied illustrations ranging from black and white photographs of St. Nicholas Church as it looks today in Demre (formerly Myra) Turkey, to 15th century paintings, to familiar icons in the Orthodox Church.  The fonts, borders and lay-out design are charming and lend itself to easy navigation among the folk tales and legends translated for the English speaking reader.

Reading this book to children is enjoyable since each tale from around the world is distinct and most are accompanied by its own illustration.  The editor’s note, which appears with every narrative, gives the reader a sense of context and also the translator’s personal thoughts;  these notes were a nice touch.

I’ve not read every tale yet, but my favorite thus far is The Legend of the Healing Myrrh which begins with a quote from John the Deacon’s Life of Nicholas, circa 880 A.D. :

“Then after most blessed Nicholas had departed from this world to the Lord, the tomb in which his venerable corpse was enclosed never ceased to distill an oleaginous liquid, even to this day.  To the spot come multitudes of weak, lame, blind withered, deaf and dumb, and ones who are vexed by unclean spirits.  When they are anointed with that holy liquor, they are restored to their original state of health.”

Since we celebrated St. Nicholas’ Feast Day on December 6th, our Sunday bulletin showed an icon of St. Nicholas on the front with a few paragraphs about his life on the back.  This, too, alluded to the miraculous liquid, also called manna which was used to anoint the faithful and heal many ills.  From our bulletin:

“You may find it interesting to note that in 1954, the crypt of St. Nicholas needed renovation and so it became necessary to exhume the saint’s body from the tomb.  When it was time to be re-interred, the linen sheet upon which it had rested was found to be soaking wet - saturated from the manna!   ..since 1980, it has been customary on the Feast Day of the Translation of the Relics of St Nicholas to Bari from Myra, for the cathedral clergy to collect the manna in an urn for later distribution to the general public.”

The Real St. Nicholas is well researched and generously offers resource pages including a selected bibliography, suggestions for further reading, sources, and a list of illustrations and credits which I particularly appreciate.  This book should be a welcome addition to anyone looking for facts and illustrations pertaining to St. Nicholas, the Bishop of Myra, as well as folk tales and legends surrounding his life.  

He is a precious saint, one whose life was marked by  faith, kindness and acts of charity and one in which modern Christians -sometimes caught up in the materialism of the season - can identify an anchor, that chief virtue that carries all others: humility.

Death, the Great Equalizer

On Wednesday of this week, my 32-year old cousin died in a car wreck. Today, I went to his funeral and cried alongside many other relatives and friends; probably several hundred. It was the most heartbreaking service I’ve ever attended.

It just isn’t natural for parents to bury their children, the cycle of life dictates the opposite and yet, some parents must face the anguish, this pain that seems to take their very breath away.
Matthew, a handsome young man, left behind two small children, a boy and a girl, loved to make music, was an excellent chef and had an infectious smile. I learned some of that only in the last few days because he was somewhat estranged from my family. I knew he had been on some troubled paths in his short life, but I have a clear memory of the last time I saw him.

It was about 5 years ago that I ran into him at a local grocery store. He surprised me by calling my name and it took a few seconds before I realized who was smiling at me. I hadn’t seen Matthew in over 18 years prior to that. What is more, and what I now see as such a blessing, is that Matthew & I probably talked for 20 or more minutes that day just standing in the aisle at the grocery. He was warm and engaging, happily telling me about going to school to become a chef and about his nephew and how he adored him. I absorbed it all, quietly thankful for such a conversation, so unexpected and so genuine. It was a gift these few minutes.

The service was unique, incorporating words from a pastor as well as live music from a string-band that played old time spirituals such as Amazing Grace and Lay Down and Sleep. We were treated to a special recording of a song that Matthew had been working on before he died. I never knew music was such a big part of his life until today. I think the most poignant moment came toward the end of the service when Michael (Matthew’s twin brother) released a white dove with his son.  

As a photographer who looks at life as a documentary much of the time, if I would have captured anything to illustrate the essence of it all, it would have been Michael holding that dove in the middle of the cemetery. The pastor explained to the quiet crowd that the dove was to symbolize Matthew’s spirit being released to God. As Michael lovingly held that bird, he moved it near his son so that he might give it a kiss on the head...and then he paused and sunk to his knees. I wondered if he could let go...

But then a beautiful thing happened and it’s partly why I am committing this to script. I don’t want to forget watching that dove fly away. It was so cold today, with temperatures in the low 30’s, yet thankfully, the winter sun lent a small warmth to a patchy blue sky. I watched the dove soar into the air, making an arc to the right and then circle left as if to allow all the guests view. There was a striking moment when the dove was in front of the sun and clouds and as I watched, two rainbows were evident on either side of the bird. It was that sliver of colors that you often see through the transparency of clouds. They held my gaze for a time and then, turning to see the dove fly east and out of sight I noticed the crowd dispersing and moving toward their cars. I searched for my sister and stole a quick glance at the sky with the patch of colors; now there was only one rainbow to discern.

For anyone reading thus far, thank you. I ask your prayers for my dear Aunt Judy, Matthew’s mother. It breaks my heart to see her so distraught. Hugging her today, I had no words...and she could only groan in anguish. Thankfully, her eldest son seemed to be her greatest strength today, he held her up, physically and emotionally, to greet the vast number of guests. If anything I would like to share with my readers tonight it is this:

Death is the great equalizer, it comes to us all. 

If we lived in such a way as to have sight of this every single day, how may it affect our choices..? When death comes, all our petty arguments and grudges pale. Be reconciled to one another. Don’t make your parting words with a loved one those of anger or accusation. Do your part in making things right in a broken relationship. Forgive, ...even when they don’t ask. Be patient with those you love, ...be quiet and listen. Seek to comfort above being comforted.

And, one more thing that was driven home to me today. We mean so well when we say it, but I am making a conscious effort to stop saying “Let me know if there’s anything I can do for you” during times of heartache. Never has anyone taken me up on that. I think it’s far better to figure out something you can do to share peace,  friendship and the love of God and then, DO IT.

Thank you for your prayers; blessings to all of you.

* Photo is from Decorative Wall Crosses

Christmas banned?

“Are you decorating for Christmas this year?” I asked my Christian friend, knowing that they were still working on various projects in their newly constructed home. With cabinets to hang, painting to do, flooring to lay, I thought perhaps the task of putting up a Christmas tree might be too much to consider.

“No, I don’t think so...” she answered, although her reason caught me by surprise. She went on to say, “..I am conflicted about putting up holiday decorations...do you know the origin of the Christmas tree? There’s so much pagan influence. I feel that God is testing me every time I go out to shop...” “Did you know Christmas was outlawed in the U.S. for a time?” she asked me.
“What? ...no..” I replied, and then added somewhat flippantly, “Well, if it was, it probably had something to do with Puritan influence.”  

I listened to her thoughts and concerns with wonder. I knew that decorating her home for Christmas had been such a pleasure in years past for her and a Christmastime staple for her kids. I recognized that her Christian heart and attitudes were reflected in the beauties of their home during the holidays.

I stammered a bit when she finished explaining about her convictions to leave all trimmings in the closet this year and asked if I could relate. “Uhhh....well, no, honestly I can’t relate. I don’t see anything wrong with putting up a tree, especially with our symbols that point to Christ. And I don’t think the pagans have any claim to our joyful celebrations of Christ’s birth; the Feast of the Nativity has been observed for centuries! I can understand the frustration with the commercialization in the U.S., but to abandon the idea all together because of ancient pagan practice....well, no. I don’t understand.  

Do you know that when St. Patrick converted the pagans, many of their lands, sacred hills and groves were reclaimed for Christ?! “

Before hanging up, I promised I would look into it further, specifically the issue of Christmas being banned in the U.S., while curbing my desire to sway her opinion thus disrespecting her stand.

It’s true that Christmas was banned in Massachusetts from 1659 to 1681 and sure enough, it was Puritan influence that accomplished it. With a motive to purge and reform the Church of England, religious art was condemned as idolatrous, ritual kept to a minimum and absolutely no feasting, decorating or keeping of the “old superstitious customs of England” in celebrating Christmas.

Interesting how Tradition may be manipulated and justified by the hands of those seeking to purify Christ’s Church. The Puritans are a curious lot to me, they sought freedom from religious tyranny (although, from what I’ve read, the Church of England was, for the most part, tolerant of their extreme views) and yet, as soon as they were liberated in the new land, enacted one of their own.

"For preventing disorders, arising in several places within this jurisdiction by reason of some still observing such festivals as were superstitiously kept in other communities, to the great dishonor of God and offense of others: it is therefore ordered by this court and the authority thereof that whosoever shall be found observing any such day as Christmas or the like, either by forbearing of labor, feasting, or any other way, upon any such account as aforesaid, every such person so offending shall pay for every such offence five shilling as a fine to the county."



From the records of the General Court, 
Massachusetts Bay Colony 
May 11, 1659

To be fair, in some regard I can understand this misguided Puritan view, inasmuch as I dislike witnessing overindulgence in food/drink/commercialism associated with Christmas and other holidays, but must we throw the baby out with the bath water? Can we not discern the spirit of vanity and indulgence with the spirit of joy at Christ’s coming in the flesh?

The Feast of the Nativity has been celebrated since the 4th century! I don’t think it’s significant that historians cannot accurately identify Jesus’ birthdate, what is important is that we have occasion to look to His coming - to observe Advent - every year. A cycle of the liturgical calendar that brings a time of reflection, fasting and joyful feasting as we proclaim “God has come in the flesh! The King of Kings, Lord of Lords, the Prince of Peace has come to dwell among us!!” How can we NOT celebrate the Incarnation?!

The pagans celebrated the Winter Solstice during Samhain, the Romans held the festival of Sol Invictus (“Unconquered Sun”) on December 25th and so, it is argued that because of these wicked idolatrous rituals, Christians are partaking of pagan worship by adorning trees, lighting candles, using a yule log or the colors of red and green, decorating with evergreen or mistletoe or even feasting on this day. The Puritans would say it was “a pagan festival with a Christian veneer”.

Does God not have authority over creation? Is it not Almighty God who makes the trees to grow and blesses the hands who fashions the beeswax candles? Does He not bless us through their fragrance so pure? Did St. Brigid not build a great community of Christians in ancient druid oak groves? She had no fear of former ties to those who practiced magic because she knew it was a land being converted, a place of transformation with God the Creator at the helm, bringing a people out of darkness to Light.

I have no qualms about decorating for Christmas, in putting up a tree with lights and ornaments that are both sentimental and religious or the Nativity scene which graces our mantle every year. I enjoy setting out our Advent wreath and letting the children light a new candle each Sunday. These are adornments used in celebration of Christ which have inadvertently forged bonds and created family traditions. They are not objects of worship, yet they remind us continually of our joy and wonder in our God who came in the flesh.

Advent

With the Orthodox Nativity Fast, or season of Advent (looking to Christ's coming) upon us, I am taking some time to reflect upon my blessings, renewing my prayer life, and reading Holy Scripture. This quote below by St. John of Kronstadt casts a light on one of my many flaws: making judgments on people, whether spoken or not, it is something to be rooted out by the renewing of the Holy Spirit in me. 

Please make straight my crooked lines, O Lord!  Enable me to see Christ in others, stay my wont of judgment and grant vision of my own sins.

Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a sinner.

"Never confuse the person, formed in the image of God, with the evil that is in him, because evil is but a chance misfortune, illness, a devilish reverie.  But the very essence of the person is the image of God, and this remains in him despite every disfigurement." -St. John of Kronstadt

Probably like many of you reading, the Lord's Prayer is a staple in our life.  You may enjoy hearing the familiar refrain in Gaelic found here.

*Celtic cross is created by one of my favorite artists,  Cari Buziak.  The ogham writing on either side of the cross reads: "Hold Fast"

Inspiring moment for the day

No, this has nothing to do with Thanksgiving, other than I wanted to share with my readers an inspiring moment from history.

It just so happens that hubby & I watched Seabiscuit last night; what an incredible story. Laura Hillenbrand's book, "Seabiscuit: An American Legend" has been on my 'must read list' for a while. Much to my surprise, I found a clip from the actual match race in 1938 between the small underdog, Seabiscuit (1933-47) and War Admiral (1934-59), a Triple Crown Winner, on YouTube this morning. Even if you aren't a horse racing fan, I think you might find a wee treasure of inspiration from this "little horse that could" by reading about him and how he encouraged a nation during the years of the Great Depression.

I wish you all joy and inspiration this Thanksgiving Day!

Bless the work of our hands to honor Thee...

Our little girl has been under the weather and so, on Sunday, I stayed home with her while hubby took our son to church.   Even though she stayed near the couch, we made good use of this quiet time together.

Praying before our icons of Jesus Christ and Blessed Mary, Josie took pleasure in lighting her own prayer candle.   I read the story of St. Benedict and his twin sister Scholastica to her and then suggested a project she might enjoy while resting with her comfy blankets.  “Why not make yourself a booklet about St. Ita, your patron saint?”

Her face glowed and I could see the creative juices flowing behind her smiling eyes.  I helped to find images and stickers she could include as well as a few facts about her saint.  She put it all together ...and then made two more books!   She spent at least 2 hours liberating her imagination - cutting, pasting, drawing, coloring - while paying tribute to three family  saints:  St. Ita, St. Patrick and St. Brigid.

She can tell you that St. Ita was born in 475 A.D., that she was a teacher and is also called “the foster mother to the saints of Ireland”.  She knows that she settled in Killeedy and we celebrate her feast day on Jan. 15th.

I think the most beautiful aspect to this project is that after Josie made her booklet about St. Patrick, she carefully wrapped it up, included a card and presented it to her brother for his birthday.

Thank you Lord for our precious treasures, those You have entrusted to us, our children.

Eating my words...

...never tasted so good.  On Sunday afternoon of this week my daughter & I were attending an artist reception in Beckley, WV.  We were both delighted to see so much snow on the ground up there!  I even commented to several guests how much we enjoyed the drive, to see the snow on the mountains since we never have much accumulation at our house in the valley.   

On Tuesday morning we awoke to a spectacular sight of fresh snow at our place!  The kids wasted no time in going outdoors to play in it since school was cancelled.  And on Wednesday morning, while driving the kids to school, it felt as if we were journeying through God's treasure box.  My photo doesn't really do the scene justice, as there were such beauties in the trees.  Smooth droplets of ice adorned the tree limbs like diamonds and the brilliant blue sky smiled on our wonder as we made our way through Glen Ferris.

King Oswald; sovereign with humility

"I saw the snares that the enemy spreads out over the world and I said groaning, "What can get through from such snares?" Then I heard a voice saying to me, "Humility." (St. Anthony the Great)

In the 7th century, a young man raised by monks on Iona, faced a tough decision.  He had resolved to march south, determined to unite Northumbria after the death of his brother.  The battle was to be fought at Heavenfield and his Welsh enemies were far superior in number.  Having converted to Christianity at a young age, Oswald decided to raise a large wooden cross on the soon-to-be battlefield and asked his soldiers to gather near to pray with him.

The battle was decisive and Oswald became king, uniting  Northumbria under his banner.  As Oswald’s popularity grew, many in this pagan land were curious about the new deity, the God of the Christians who had won their king’s obedience.   

History tells us that King Oswald was concerned not only with the restoration of Northumbria, but the spiritual state of those within his realm as well.  His sainthood is traced to the fact that he re-introduced Christianity  to this northern kingdom, sending for an evangelical Bishop from Iona to help with the task.  When St. Aidan arrived to preach the Gospel and win converts, it was the king himself who often acted as interpreter since Bishop Aidan only spoke Gaelic.

This noble king served Christ by serving his people.  He fed the hungry and brought the light of Christ to many lives.  It is said that when he lay dying on the battlefield, slain by the pagan King of Mercia, he prayed for his bodyguards who had fallen with him, the salvation of Northumbria and his enemies.

May our world leaders endeavor to follow in the footsteps of Oswald of Northumbria, ever seeking the way of the cross.

Prayer:

Lord God almighty, who so kindled the faith of your servant Oswald with your Spirit that he set up the sign of the passion in his kingdom and turned his people to your light: grant that we, being fired with the same Spirit, may ever be found faithful servants of the Gospel; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

written by James Kiefer

*prayer found here.

Daily Weaving logo

I know... this is incredibly presumptuous...

forgive me, but I'm having a day of creative flow so thought I would make a logo, of sorts, for this blog.   If you like one of them, you are welcome to use it to link this blog to your own web space.  Just right click on the image and save to your own computer:

Máiréad

Just in case you ever wondered what a real Irish fairy looks and sounds like...

I am not at all surprised that Máiréad Nesbitt  was chosen as a featured soloist in the musical score of the new Disney film, "Tinker Bell".  She defines the little pixie in the best sort of way =-)

Here she is performing Granuaile's Dance with Celtic Woman, live at Slane Castle, Ireland:

Chasing Blue Herons and Swans

As the leaves fall and the fog swiftly rolls down the Gauley River most mornings, I feel blessed to live in this neck of the woods.  Very often, as I take the kids to school, we are greeted by the morning sun playing peek-a-boo through thick blankets of mist above the confluence of the New and Gauley Rivers.  And, every morning for the past two years, I’ve been on the look out for blue herons.  

Autumn typically brings migratory birds through our area on their long journeys south.  One December day in 2004 I spent nearly an hour photographing a large flock of Ring-billed gulls playfully darting through the air and then resting on the quiet river.  Those large white gulls brought a highlight to an otherwise bleak and gray winter day.  

Recently the kids and I have spotted a Whistling Swan on the Kanawha River.  We’ve seen her every day for the last 2 weeks; apparently she’s found a prime feeding spot.  Whistling swans usually make an appearance  this time of year, but it’s unusual to see only one since they migrate in flocks.  Whatever her story is, she seems quite content to swim and feed alone.  In the evenings sometimes we’ll see her with the resident flock of Canada geese.

It was on November 3rd this year that I finally had the opportunity to photograph a blue heron!  I’ve been “chasing” these birds ever since I first noticed them stalking frogs and fish along the New River near Beckwith.  I’ve been out time and again with my camera but usually leave in disappointment as I watch it fly away or move to an area just out of reach.  I’ve had to laugh at myself in all the failed attempts; being out of breath with a heavy backpack strapped on, fumbling to grab the right lens and then to watch the heron gracefully fly away, deciding that the fishin’s better half mile downriver.

I’ve developed a great admiration for wildlife photographers; they are among the most patient people in the world, waiting hours, days or even weeks in secluded areas behind blinds to capture a raw view of God’s creation.

"Grab your coats; let's go!!" I shouted to the kids on that Monday afternoon.  They think I’m nuts to chase after the herons, but I told them it would be time well spent.  It was.   For roughly 40 minutes, my son enjoyed the fishing on the opposite bank from the blue heron while my daughter and I hiked about 80 yards down river in order to sit and photograph this thoughtful bird.   I guess we were still far enough away not to cause a disturbance, probably 50-60 yards, because he didn’t seem to move for the longest time.

I snapped frame after frame, thanking God for the opportunity in between.  The sun felt warm on our faces in spite of the cool fall air and I realized too, how good - how important- it is to be still and behold God’s creation.

These golden moments are epiphanies of the eternal.  Thank you, Lord, for every living thing, for Your light in this world, for moments to be still and know that You are God!

Salute to the United States and our veterans

I remain optimistic about our nation, even as I see Valerie Jarrett, of Barak Obama's transition team, proclaim that he will be ready to "Rule" on day one.  This is fitting language for one who is hailed as "The messiah" of the liberal lunatic fringe.  And, even as I begin to understand the motives behind the Fairness Doctrine and why it is anything but "fair", I smile at the future.

No pressure, no diamonds, as a popular saying goes.  This campaign season has been the first one in a long time to motivate me to read and research the issues.  It's been the first campaign in my life where I believe we've had  two presidential candidates espousing such extremely opposing views on the future of this country, on the sanctity of life, on the role of government, and the finesse of foreign policy.  For honest Republicans, lovers of liberty, life and those who believe in upholding the U.S. Constitution, this time in our history has created the ideal soil in which to flourish. 

Booker T. Washington said, "Secure an education at any cost."   My prayer is that parents everywhere are teaching their kids about our nation's Founding Fathers, the wisdom in the U.S. Constitution and the countless lives that have been sacrificed to uphold our freedoms in the United States of America.  I am thankful I can worship, write my opinions, keep arms and educate my children without fear of government.  We should never take it for granted.

"Those who expect to reap the blessing of freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it."  - Thomas Paine

THANK YOU to the men and women in uniform who serve and have served to protect our nation.

*Political cartoons were found here.

Hell House - Christian outreach?

Ghouls and ghosts, mummies and vampires, that’s what haunted houses are made of?  Or so I thought.  I’m really not too sure because I don’t endorse them.  I can recall years ago when our church youth group - yes, a church youth group -  visited a popular one, only I was the odd duck out.  

It puzzled me then and it puzzles me now as to how being scared is “fun and entertaining” let alone the idea of a church sponsoring a haunted house ...or field...or trail..or whatever other place might be used to spotlight fear and death.

And then I read about Hell House.  

Hell House is a violent haunted house sponsored by the Pentecostal Trinity Church near Dallas, Texas that attracts over 13,000 people every October.  “The Church hopes to scare the hell out of them”  according to their website.  The church is using this modern media as part of an evangelical outreach, affecting a haunted house to serve as a pulpit for the ultimate fire and brimstone sermon.

Visitors to Hell House are led room to room by “demons” to view scenes of school massacres, teen suicide, date rape, drunk driving, drug use and botched abortions.  The idea is to shock and overwhelm visitors, who may not be church goers or believers at all, into examining the realities of life and the choices they must face.  The phenomenon of Hell House has been so popular it was made into a documentary film some years ago which you can find on Amazon; I found an interesting online film review here.

Reading abut Hell House immediately took me back to my days at Calvary Baptist Church as a preteen and being made to watch “Will You Be Left Behind?”  a movie that preceded the evangelical world’s infatuation with the Left Behind series by Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins.  This movie scared me and was the source of subsequent nightmares.  Which brings me to the question, does our culture need to be scared into following Christ?  Do the world news headlines everyday not serve this purpose?!  

According to the reviews I read, at the end of the Hell House encounter, visitors are taken to a “decision room” where they learn about Jesus and the alternative path in this world.  There they are pressured into accepting Christ and praying the sinner’s prayer, hopefully invoking an emotional conversion experience.  

As an Orthodox Christian, I have mixed feelings about Hell House.  On the one hand, reading about it left me with thoughts of C.S. Lewis and his Screwtape letters, depicting a demon’s view on sin and spiritual warfare.  A book which may ‘shock’ the complacent person into a new perspective on sin and yet, Hell House presents theological problems that I didn’t find evident in Lewis’ writings.

Coming from an evangelical background, I can testify that there is a problem for many new converts who go through an emotional conversion experience only to drift for a few months or years wondering, “What next?” “How do I follow Christ? What does it mean to be a disciple?”  “Does gaining knowledge equal spiritual growth?”

There is an insightful review I found on Amazon while reading about the Hell House documentary.  It allegedly comes from a former cast member and he writes:

“I spent ten years working various scenes at the Trinity Church Hellhouse. Yes, it is a bit campy, and yes, it is often over the top, but I can say that the people are well intentioned, just a bit off target. I attended Trinity Church from birth until I was 22 years old. I do not attend their anymore because of the close-minded attitude that is prevalant in this documentary. I stopped doing HellHouse when they added the decision room my last year. I just felt it was an un-biblical scare tactic. I now feel that way about the entire operation. The worst feeling I get is knowing the young teenagers are blindly following the leadership without doing any research themselves. I know because I was once one of them. I have found that a growing number of former Trinity Youth Group members my age do not attend there for the same reasons I listed above. This movie will open your eyes to the way teens are herded like cattle in fundamentalist Christian Churches.”